Jesus continued: “There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the estate.’ So he divided his property between them.
“Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything.
“When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.’ So he got up and went to his father.
“But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him.
“The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’
“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate. (Luke 15:11-24 NIV84)
Prodigal, wasteful: both are synonymous. Both are very much descriptive of me. Have you ever been there? Been in a place where everything you are is empty and everything you do seems pointless? You go over the last few months in your head and wonder where you fell into the deep end? Today has been a reflection day for me. I went to church this morning, and I literally can't tell you the last time I have been to a church two weekends in a row before today. Pinelake is doing to series on spiritual disciplines. Last week was giving. This week was prayer. After the sermon was over, the preacher gave us some time for prayer, probably 5 minutes or so. My thoughts were absolutely empty. I had nothing to say. I haven't earnestly sought Him in prayer for so long that I didn't know what to say and I feel very undeserving to speak. You know when you see a person you haven't seen in a long time and conversation with them is the epitome of awkward? I feel like prayer is the same way for me right now. So after church, I tried to dodge the conviction that had just literally been hurled at my heart. Watched a movie. Took a nap. Read other blogs. LL, thank you for your reminder that He is always faithful. And, McCall, your blog just inspires me every time I read it, whether it's cake batter dip or urging me to follow His plan for me. Thank you.
What am I running from? I once heard that if there were 10,000 steps between me and Jesus, if I would just take 1 step, He would RUN the 9,999 remaining to get to me. What kind of love is that? It is relentless. It is never ending. It is powerful. The thing holding me back from it is me. I do firmly believe that the one thing that keeps us most from experiencing God is ourselves. "I don't deserve it," or "That's too hard," or my personal favorite to use, " I don't have time." Why in this world would we let anything keep us from a God who loves us more than we could ever dream? God desires you. He calls you His own. No, you aren't deserving but He makes you more than deserving when you're covered in His grace. Jesus was sent to earth, laughed at, spit on, beaten, tortured, and killed as an innocent man so that we could live a life in slavery, bound up by ourselves and sin and have a life without joy? NO! He came so that we could finally be free from condemnation, free from ourselves, free from sin, full of life, full of joy, full of love, full of Him. He loves you. He loves me, no matter how prodigal I have been.
Your love never fails, it never gives up, it never runs out on me.
